“Healthy teeth are happy teeth”

That was the only quote we could get from Grape boss and head-of-tackling Dan Holt who, if rumours are to be believed, is slipping further into insanity. “I told the boys, brush at the back, no more plaque”.

The famously silent and press-wary 7th chamber, who usually shy away from bold statements in favour of internal team talks, and motivational weekends at Champneys, have been goaded by the hype loving boys at Grape into issuing a formal statement, the 7th chamber’s nominated spokesperson, and east-London fashionista, Darcy ‘the hair’ Mitchell, had this to say, “Oh, oh, shall I get one up?” – wise words from one of the industry’s leading tactitioners, but perhaps a nod to grape that this week they should be looking to the skies. Protective netting found on the 7th chamber’s training ground (the leagues shortest team by some 8 inches) could also point to this.

Continuing their PR stunt, the 7th chamber are expecting a lot of photographers down at today’s match. Fiona “I’m not related to Max” Moseley was spotted sniffing around the Hallowed Old Street turf with her lens out.

In related news, perennial 7th chamber excuse-merchant, Louise Earl won’t be playing this week because A.) She hasn’t got shinpads, or B.) She doesn’t want more bruises on her shins. Earl leaves it to you to decide. William Hill haven’t ruled out an appearance before the end of the season, but the odds are the same as the match ending without tears from a 7C goalie, or in other words, very slim.

As Grape point out in their ego-stroking statement issued earlier this morning (http://grape-digital.com/2011/02/the-forecast-is-goals-goals-and-more-goals/) the only real speculation remains over whether 7th Chamber new signing and wonder kid, Chris of the North will be playing… only time will tell.

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